some reflections

I'm a certified open water diver!!! Whoo hoo! So exciting! Getting scuba certified is something I never, ever in my wildest dreams imagined doing. But I did it! Even when I was a little seasick and nauseaus and dizzy, I still did it. And it was incredible. Swimming in the ocean amid corals and fishes of all shapes, sizes and colors, seeing sting rays and sharks up close, and being that far below water is so cool and so beautiful. I hope I use this skill a lot (even though it is an expensive hobby), especially because my time is so short here in Fiji and money limited. But who knows? If not, I'll be certified forever and I'll always be able to tell the story of getting scuba certified. It's scary, that's for sure. And my ears hurt. And now I have an ear infection! But, it was totally worth it.

That's about the only cool thing that's happened in a while. On the work end, we finally got the fish pond dug- yay!!! It only took a year! I'll be curious to see what happened while I was away on some much needed leave time. And, the women got their co-op store back! That's been exciting, and a battle. It hasn't been easy but for the most part, people are really excited and happy about it. It's great training and working with the women. They just have to keep it up! They'll show those stodgy old men that women aren't lazy, they are smart and just as educated, and they do have business sense! The goal of the store is to earn money for more store improvements and to put towards a kitchen/bakery for the community hall.

Whew! While I felt like this wasn't enough, like I haven't been doing enough in the village, I learned that this is quite a lot. I suppose it is. We do a lot of other, smaller things that I think are just as valid and mean a lot, too. Does this mean Peace Corps should continue work in my village? That will be decided soon, but I can't say for sure. It's tricky- do you want the village to rely on outside organizations like PC or be independent after having two PCVs in the village?

I also realized so much else about my site. 1. I love Vanua Levu. It's so beautiful up here!!! Everything is so lush (outside of the Labasa side) and green and healthy. There is a diversity of plants. The ocean provides an astounding view as you're driving. It's so wonderful up here, compared to northern Viti Levu (sorry!). 2. The life is better, in my opinion, also. It's so laid back and people are so helpful and fun and work hard. And very self-sufficient. My village is so lucky to be so educated and motivated. At times it seems like they're not, but compared to other villages... we're pretty awesome. 3. As a PCV, you get out of this experience what you put in. i feel like that's a lame statement, but I think it's very true. If you spend a lot of time in your house by yourself, or in town with other PCVs, that's the experience you'll have. Sure, you'll take away big issues and changes and attitude adjustments, but you're not in America and you can't pretend that you are or live like you are. I'm excited to go home, but I do so with a very heavy heart. I really love my village and the people in it. We have had some hard times, but we've had a lot of good. I've had my share of tears and troubles and heartaches but that happens anywhere you are. I love that I spend so much time outside of my house. Sometimes I'm so busy I haven't touched a book all week. And while it might not look like a lot of tangible 'work' has been accomplished, my garden, my yaqona plantation, fishing, cooking, gathering food, drinking grog, singing with the choir, going to church, helping prepare for big gatherings, going to other villages, and being a part of the community has left me little time to sit around wishing I was someplace else. This only lasts for so long. After this, I'll have to go back to America with a job that probably won't pay me much. I'll be so dependent on money and I wont' have the luxury of 'kere kere'ing from my neighbors, or going over to someone's house in the middle of the day and sitting around talking, or learning from the people around me like I have here. I've been forced out of my comfort zone and maybe I have just spoken into an empty hole a lot of the time but I know that some people have heard me. I will have left something behind, tangibly, emotionally, environmentally, mentally. It goes both ways.

Lecture over.
taylar, out.